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Sarah

LOL, you're not *that* evil. I mean, at least you didn't bite their heads off every time they offended you in some way (I know, you probably did mentally, and yes, a saint wouldn't do that, room for improvement etc., but still, not bad).

Re: #1. I'm usually the food-focused one, and I will happily lead the charge into a restaurant if I sense too much hesitation going on. Luckily for me, most of the people I travel with either understand and anticipate my need for food (e.g., my husband) or share it, so I'm set.

Re: #2. I kick myself for this one all the time. There are a couple of people I work with who will spout banalities and trite sayings for any occasion, and the aggravating thing is, I really think they believe in what they're saying. They're being sincere! It makes me feel awful for despising them for saying such beat-to-death things. Still working on that one.

Re: #3. I hear about this sort of thing a lot, but have only rarely experienced it. Is it possible your boyfriend's mum has largely forgotten what it's like to be unmarried and courting, for lack of a better phrase? If she's used to being around her husband day in and day out, for years, her desire to socialize may have blinded her to the realization that a young, romantic couple needs some alone-time while on vacation. My mother is normally amazingly shrewd about all things concerning the relationships of her children, but even she's slipped up on this one once or twice, and I think that's the reason. Really, your boyfriend ought to be the one to stand up to his mum on things like this (politely, of course).

Well, that's my 2 cents. Did you try any white German wine, and did you like it? ;-) Oh, and here's something I'm curious about: if you don't believe in God, why do you use the expression "Oh my God"? You're not alone, I know tons of atheists who do that, I've just always wondered why.

Sonetka

Nah, not that bad; I think we all go through it. It wouldn't be too great if you were snapping in their faces, but you're not - you're snapping on your blog, which is the appropriate place for such things anyway :).

And I fully sympathize with the problem - my in-laws are fantastic, raised great kids, I love them, but my father-in-law is, like Sarah's coworkers, addicted to platitudes. He just isn't very good the verbal end of things, for a lot of reasons (though he's a friggin' genius in biology, which I barely got through two semesters of) and often ends up saying things that don't come out quite right, and this drives me unreasonably nuts. (I remember after I got pregnant - after 9 treatment cycles and a horrifying number of both drug injections and dead embryos) he said something to the effect of "By the way, if you feel you can't do this again, it's completely all right with us if you want to adopt your other children." I know what he *meant*, which is that he and my mother-in-law are supportive of our adopting and won't be second-guessing us - which is great - but the way he said it, it sounded like he was officially giving us permission to consider the possibility. Granted, on the offensiveness scale, it's not even a patch on the classic "Just relax" but it irritated me a lot, and I feel bad about that, since I know he didn't mean anything bad by it.

Sonetka

Ugh, sorry for the all the typos in the previous post (ironic, considering I'm supposedly the verbal one!) Way past bedtime out here.

Jenny

Thanks guys! Am amused, Sarah, to see you are as intolerant of cliche as me (which is silly, because I'm SURE I use them all the time - just different ones!). IT just makes me want to shout out inappropriate things like 'No! Death is sweet release!' when they start in with the 'life is fragile' crap.

I did drink a LOT of white wine (also a lot of German beer) - the red wine in that area is rightly called 'rotwein'. Bought home a couple of bottles of nice dry Reisling. It's a great area - every spare inch of land is covered in vine, and they were all turning autumn colours. And the producers literally do want you to knock on their doors and try. However - I've decided that white wine definitely dries my mouth out more than red - if I have it at lunch I'll feel parched all afternoon. Still, you can't complain - the bottles we bought were yum, and about $5!

Re: 'Oh My God' - totally a verbal tic - I'm aware of the contradiction (!) but I'll never stop saying it - it's very *expressive*! Do you say it, or do you try not to?

Sonetka - Bloody hell , talk about not having a way with words - your FIL must permanently have his foot in his mouth. On the old 'infertile idiocy'scorecard, that's a pretty good one.

And I'm so sorry you have gone through so much - to resort hypocritically to cliches, life is BLOODY unfair.

Aitch

Wow, I think you have every right to gripe. In-laws can be so...Wrong sometimes.

Sarah

I try not to say "Oh my God", and mainly I succeed. I substitute with "Gosh" and words like that... I occasionally slip and either mentally or verbally utter a profanity, but I do try hard to not take my Lord's name in vain. :-) I admit though, I do say "Good Lord" on occasion, which is probably just as bad. Memo to self: stop that! ;-) That all being said, I think there are times when "Oh my God" would NOT be taking God's name in vain, but it depends on the seriousness of the matter at hand.

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